i'm sorry everyday (6/30)

Guilt is boulders
Dark,
Heavy,
Hazardous,
Somewhere between my
Inner thighs
Self esteem
First and last name

Guilt is boulders
Pummeling tight, innocent hard to reach places
Stuffed into every vowel escaping my lips
Tongue
Teeth
Gums
Throat
Mouth

Guilt is boulders
At the edge
Of the cliff
Of my mind

I used to be light
Now I’m heavy like eyelids chasing the coattails of dawn

Guilt is boulders
Atop my spine
In my head
In my mind
My spine is shattered
A heavy conscious is painful to carry on raw, bare, shoulders

I want to be a feather once more.